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Motherhood is often spoken about in terms of love, and joy, with gooey images of a perfect pink baby and mother cocooned together. That image is true, yet, beneath the surface lies a complex inheritance—beliefs, wounds, and patterns passed down through generations. Some of what we carry serves us well, while other parts burden us, shaping how we mother in ways we don’t always understand. To mother with more awareness and kindness, we need to look at what we’ve inherited and, crucially, what we want to pass on—the mother we want our child to have.
The Invisible Load of Epigenetic Trauma
Science now confirms what many have long intuited: trauma can be passed down from one generation to the next. This is not just through behaviours and parenting styles but also in our very genes. Unprocessed pain from one generation, if left unacknowledged, seeps into the next—until someone is prepared to feel it, acknowledge it, release it and begin to heal.
For many of us, this means mothering with echoes of our own mothers’ and grandmothers’ wounds—as well as our own— often termed ‘ghosts from the nursery’..
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